In Central Singaore marriage is considered a beautify relationship that binds two souls who have love and compassion in their hearts. FamilyRootsOrganizer is strong advocate of the fact that having someone in your life gives you the peace of mind that you have the support and love your need in order to succeed and live a healthy life.
Well, most of the time it happens that people in Central Singaore find someone who can offer them such things, but, also some of the time it happens that people don’t get these things from their spouse and after a particular time period, they get separated from each other.
While, this is the huge steps that any person will take in his/her life because no matter there have been years or few months in their marriage, but they are emotionally attached to each other so that they cannot take this thing quite easily.
Now the question might pop up in someone’s mind that why then people get divorced if it is quite a painful thing to do for them. So, for the answer to this question, we are here going to tell you about 5 common causes of divorce in Central Singaore.
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My husband and I were together for eight years before we got married. You would think we would have known everything about one another by then. We thought we did too. That is, until a middle-aged man grilled us on every aspect of our future marriage, from babies to death.
We chose to be married in the Catholic church, so Pre-Cana (a premarital counseling course and consultation for couples) is mandatory. We knew this was the case, and I was actually pretty excited about it. For me, it meant I could discuss concrete things in our future without bringing it up myself—or freaking him out.
If I’m being honest, I think I also secretly harbored dreams of the aforementioned middle-aged man telling us we’ve done it—we have the perfect relationship! We would leave with baby names and a certificate that read “Your Marriage Is Guaranteed to Last Forever.” A little over a year into marriage, I now realize: There’s no such thing as perfect or guarantees, but there is such a thing as being as prepared as you can be. I can’t think of a better reason to be the latter when the stakes are love, happiness and, oh you know, the rest of your life.
1. In which areas would you like to help your fiancé improve?
Oh yeah, they start you out with just straight up critiquing your significant other. Only you have to communicate it delicately and truthfully, which is a lesson in itself.
2. What are some matters about which the two of you have different opinions?
What?! You can discuss the elephants in the room, and your entire relationship won’t disintegrate?!
3. If both have careers, whose job determines where you will live?
Whoa. That’s a doozy. We tackled this one with less of a definitive answer (think: “my job determines where we’ll go”) and decided this would be something we would face together and would involve weighing several other factors.
It felt more like a lesson in teamwork. A lot of the premarriage counseling questions had a side benefit to them. After this one in particular, we both felt we could conquer something like this together and agreed, at that moment, to do so.
4. What do you usually fight about and when do you usually fight?
Somehow I never really saw the pattern until we answered this question, but it was there all along. There were some pretty stupid things I was getting mad about, and usually it was when these little things built up over time that the fights happened.
Just realizing this has helped eliminate issues that could’ve ended up causing a real strain on our relationship. Dumb arguments will always be a thing as long as I am a part of any relationship, but at least now my husband sees them coming and can identify the solution quickly.
5. If you should be unable to have your own, would you adopt a child?
Nothing is off-limits in premarital counseling. Instead of shying away from topics like infertility, you face them head-on, which alleviates much of the tension and fear on the topic.
6. On your deathbed, what would sum up your life as worthwhile? What would give meaning to your life?
Being someone’s partner is so much more than just “you cook; I clean.” It’s lifting them up and helping them have a fulfilling life. What I learned in premarriage counseling:
First step: Admitting you’re not the ultimate fulfillment for your fiancé’s life.
Second step: Finding out what else is and doing everything in your power to give that to your partner.
Third step: Be on the receiving end of step one and two.
7. What do you intend to do to stay in love?
Turns out Netflix and chill is only a piece of the formula to permanent, lasting love. Our counselor told us that his wife and him dance together every day. Even when they’re furious at one another, they spend five minutes dancing in their kitchen. It reminds them of why they married one another in the first place. It sounds like it’s straight out of a Nicholas Sparks novel, but I swear it’s what he said!
Instead of waiting around and hoping that "staying in love" happens, premarriage counseling made us start planning on how to stay in love—while we were still engaged. Hard conversations and trying times will always be something we face, but after just a few hours in front of a counselor, we felt more equipped to face them. More importantly, we felt more confident that we can face them together.
One of the biggest reasons that you will find as the cause of divorce is infidelity. This thing determines the activity of cheating your spouse on someone. Since it is obvious that every person that gets married vows to spend the rest of his/her life with that person only. He/she takes some vows according to which he/she will never leave his/her spouse, will never hurt him/her and also not let him/her alone in any situation. Well, this thing happens to almost every person but in some cases, people get into infidelity due to which their relationship does not work out.
Well, the divorce step in the case of infidelity does not take by the person who is cheating, but by the person that is being cheated by that person. In this case, when the other person finds out that his/her spouse is involved with any other person and he/she is cheated on me, then he/she does not want to live with that person anymore and he/she claims the divorce to get apart.
2. Money And Finances
Another one of the biggest elements that become the cause of divorce between two people is money. Well, money is the most basic need that every person wants to have in his life. There is nothing can be done in a real-life if a person doesn’t have money in Central Singapore. Although the financial status varies from one another if we say that a person had survived in his/her life without money in his/her hand, then it is totally wrong.
Well, in the case of marriage, money and financial status play an important role. If a person, especially man, is financially strong, then his woman will go far with him by living happily, but if the status goes down by any reason, then there is a huge chance that she does not want to live without that person and she get divorce from him. Additionally, this thing applies on the man, like if a person has a figure in his mind that his wife will get with her in her account and she will make him as the caretaker of that amount, then the man will consider that lady, but if she finds out after some time that the things those he was expecting from her, will not be fulfilled in any case, then he gets himself apart from her. In such cases, the relationships are meant to be materialistic instead of emotional.
3. Lack of Communication
According to resaerch conducted by FamilyRootsOrganizer every relationship is built on effective communication. If you are do not talk a lot with a person to whom you have some kind of relationship, then you will not be able to take it way too far.
The same thing happens in the case of marriage. This relationship in Central Singaore highly needs to build effective communication to make it strong. Both husband and wife need to talk to each other on different topics and spend quality time with each other. When this thing does not happen, then there appear clashes between both of them. Both people feel mental differences from each and they don’t get a proper time to make their relationship strong. This is the reason that they end up being divorced and get separated from each other.
4. Lack of Intimacy
Sex is also another one of the most important things that makes a relationship stronger. We at FamilyRootsOrganizer believe if your spouse is not sexually fit as you are, then you will not be able to handle the relationship because every person has some particular sexual needs. If they are being fulfilled, then you will definitely a source by which you can get make these needs fulfilled.
This is the reason that when a person between husband or wife, feels lack of intimacy, then you will alternately end up to be divorced, and find any other person with which you are fully satisfied.
5. Abuse: Physical Or Mental
Abusing is also quite an essential thing that become the reason of divorce between two people. No matter, it is sexual abuse, emotional abuse, or any kind of physical abuse, no person can bear it for a long time. In this case, he/she will alternately take an action and demand for divorce or permanent separation.
How getting relationship therapy can help save the relationship?
Well, everything in this world has some kind of therapy for the betterment and improvement in that thing. If you are depressed or get anxiety attacks, then you will definitely get a proper therapy session, to get rid of it. Similarly, there is also a relationship therapy that helps you out to run your relationship better.
FamilyRootsOrganizer therapies help you out to understand the positive aspects of your relationship and give it a chance to work out. They encourage you to give your relationship a chance and try to make it better by changing your attitude or tackling the other person’s behavior.
So, make sure to have the relationship therapy if you are involved in any of this situation and give your marriage a chance instead of divorce.
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Even if you have been dating for years, it’s not safe to assume that you have both done a thorough examination of what kind of history, experience, and emotional baggage you’re each bringing into your marriage. A good personal inventory includes everything, such as your health, professional life, friendships, how you’ve handled finances, past dating relationships, and your faith journey.
Thoughtful questions from a trusted counselor or mediator can help bring to light any history that might play a bigger role in your relationship than you may think. Questions such as, “What have been your biggest disappointments in life?” and, “What have been your greatest triumphs in life?” turned out to be big questions for us. This inventory took me three hours to complete with a lot of tears, but it was all worth it. It brought up things I didn’t realize about myself. Having a better understanding of who we are individually and then sharing that with each other in the counseling session was hugely beneficial for us.
This part of counseling really homes in on how much family has shaped you. Whether you are currently close with your family or not, you spent years under its design, being immersed in how your parents communicate with each other, your extended family, and you. These things will definitely impact a future marriage because you will both become part of each other’s respective families.
As part of our pre-marriage preparation, we underwent a comprehensive evaluation about our families. We answered questions about what our family was like growing up and what our family dynamics are like presently. We discussed our relationships with parents, siblings, and extended family to get a better idea of how these relationships have shaped us. We also examined roles our parents played in the household. And big, scary things too: Trauma. Addiction. Divorce.
We discovered that we have more anxiety about marriage than others, whose parents were high-school sweethearts and are still married. If the thought of this deep dive into your family history makes you squirm a little, that’s perfectly normal. Our families are such an intimate part of who we are that we’re protective of that part of ourselves, and it can be hard to discuss the hurts and dive into how it might influence our future family.
As part of this exercise, we’ve talked about chores, grocery shopping, bill paying, vacation time, pets, children (and, of course, sex), how often we will entertain in our home, how often we’d like to have date nights, even down to who will make the bed in the morning. (Seriously!) It’s easy now to try to assign each other tasks and duties, and of course that doesn’t guarantee or cement them. But I’m actually really happy that we have a chance to talk these things out before we begin living together.
Few people enjoy talking about money, and we certainly did not look forward to this conversation. But money, how we think about it and what we do with it, plays a big part in marital happiness. In our pre-engagement sessions we were posed with great questions when talking about finances. Here are a few of the important questions to cover in a conversation about money:
Who will be the primary financial provider in the family?
How will you decide on major purchases?
Who will pay the bills, balance the checkbook, and keep track of expenses?
What is your philosophy of giving (charitable donations to your church or other organizations), and how will you make decisions about giving?
What is your conviction about debt and the use of credit cards?
These were just a handful of the financial questions we were asked to think about. We also discussed how we want to handle our finances as a couple and individually (joint or separate bank accounts). It’s a lot to think about, but the goal was to get on the same page.